A WRESTLE WITH GOD
THE WHY
Believe it or not, I didn't want to do this. Despite my innate talent for creative arts from a young age, my dreams were not in art. However, in 2017, I found myself trapped in the grips of depression, and this marked the next four years of struggling to survive and a relentless quest to understand why God would permit such suffering.
During this dark time, I immersed myself in the Bible, searching for answers. Remarkably, it was within its pages that I found solace. The Bible's words healed me, answered me, and ignited a passion to see the verses constantly. I was struck with the idea of displaying it on my wall, combining it with imagery to deepen its impact.
In June 2020, this journey led me to a profound realization: God had orchestrated these events all along. Gifted with artistic talent, I was subjected to a severe trial, only to recognize a void in the world that I believe I was uniquely positioned to fill. I observed that many companies either relegated scripture-themed products to the realm of high-end luxury or prioritized their personal branding over the essence of the message and the quality of design.
THE CHALLANGE
Yet, despite these revelations, I continue to grapple with feelings of inadequacy and unpreparedness for the monumental task of disseminating God's Word through my art. The scripture from James 3:1, which cautions, "Not many of you should become teachers, my fellow believers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly," looms large in my mind.
The fear of misrepresentation, the potential for error, and the prospect of stringent judgment are ever-present concerns that plague me. This endeavor, this divine calling, is fraught with challenges. It keeps me up at night.
In 2024, I disregarded my comfort and became obedient to a purpose far greater than I could have envisioned. I have come to fall in love with my work and the idea that I can help someone by using scripture, as it has helped me.
OUR APPROACH
I am also equally devoted to fostering hope and supporting initiatives aimed at suicide prevention and awareness. These issues, often relegated to the shadows and seldom addressed, are central to our concerns. After all, this venture originated from my confrontation with depression and the quest for healing.
The four-year delay in launching CanvMe was not a period of procrastination; rather, it was a time of intense spiritual wrestling, coming to terms with the demands of this divine assignment. CanvMe represents my submission to His will, a declaration that, despite my fears and the judgment I may face from God if I mess up, I am willing to serve.
Thus, CanvMe moves forward, and if, through this endeavor, just one person finds comfort and strength or is reminded of God's presence in their life, then the years and the thousands of sleepless hours invested in this project will have been all worth it.